After a brief post Christmas break from craft, I got itchy fingers. I asked my daughter what I should make next, and she asked for a blanket. We looked for ideas together and found a gorgeous granny square blanket in solid colours. Yes, I thought, this will be great and fun and rewarding and I can buy LOADS of brightly coloured balls of wool! I thought I was making good progress with my granny squares. It felt a bit like coming home, the simple, repetitive process of crocheting identical little squares. And much to my joy, I noticed how much faster I was at making them compared to this time last year. Oh yes, all was good. I would whip through this project in no time!!!


So, I thought I’d sew a few together, just to get a sense of the colours, but also because I genuinely thought I had loads and might really make some headway.

Here are some of the things I learned as I did this:

I would be lying if I said this was either an easy, quick or fun process. It was boring and lengthy and I got really irritated and swore a lot as it dawned upon me that this whole blanket thing is gonna take a lot longer than I envisaged.

I also learned that whilst I think all of the squares I’m making are the same size, they are quite considerably different! This, obviously irritated me MASSIVELY, not least because of all the blogposts that I read where people display their squares all utterly perfect and uniform in size. Why can’t I do this too? I wonder if it’s due to the time of day I’m crocheting or how stressed I feel. Or maybe just because I’m shite.

The sudden realisation that this is going to take ages!
I’m annoyed. But I’m persevering. I have convinced myself that the squares, once joined together, will stretch and adjust to all seem to be identical in size. I know that as I go on with my massive granny square blanket project, not only will I age considerably but my joining, by virtue of how much I’m going to have to do, will improve. And, I’m guessing that by the end (if it ever comes) the result will be, if not exquisite, then, at least, accurate!

My big girl who asked for the blanket laughed at me when I told her in a concerned voice that it had not started as neatly and as professionally as I’d hoped. Her words were, ‘If you hadn’t told me I wouldn’t have noticed’ and ‘stop worrying so much.’ Ah, from the mouths of babes. The student teaching the master and all other fortune cookie, proverb related stuff.

Well, we all love Yoda!
Anyway, I’ve made about 70 squares. After my morning’s labours, I can now see I will be needing something like 700 squares. Holy shit. Can I really do this? Will it be the unfinished project that sits at the bottom of the cupboard, mocking me, will it be the ultimate let down for my daughter, who asked me to make it? Can I do it, and more importantly, can I get it done before she leaves home? I admit, I am feeling distracted by the prospect of other, shorter and more sexy projects.

I ended 2016 toasting the New Year with a crochet hook in my hand and the pattern for R2D2 at my side! If you type #starwarscrochet into instagram, you are met with 2655 posts, images of hundreds of crocheted Star Wars characters! #Yodacrochet has 135! This means that there are 135 other people out there who either crocheted Yoda or who are interested in yoda and crochet and want to share this with other like minded Yoda crochet people!


Why? Because. Loser? Maybe, but it makes me smile! It is addictive and compelling to look at what we are all making, all over the world in every language imaginable. I bloody love it! Now that I am borderline obsessive about my craft projects, I spend quite a lot of time obsessing over other peoples’ posts and blogs. I have to admit that I love the colour and the creativity that greets me when I refresh my feed. I also discovered the world of #amigurumi. This whole making little toys/figures thing actually has a name and a cult of its own. I think this is where the really cool, young, beautiful crafters are to be found, surfing the #amigurumi instagram feed! They are not slaving over granny squares. No, they are sipping cocktails whilst creating perfect miniature unicorns, Hello Kitty dolls and rainbows, photographing them stylishly and with just enough irony to make it ok and enviable and making me want to do it too!


But my increasing proportion of grey to brown hair, my ever more wrinkly skin and my propensity for wearing clothes for comfort rather than style, dictates that I will never be a true member of the #amigurumi club. Perhaps the odd dalliance, Boba Fett or Han Solo? Just one cute little unicorn to cheer me on my way? And then, to operation granny I must return.